THURSDAY/FRIDAY
In for the count
Whether the action’s in Ireland, the UK or America, I can’t resist those late night/early morning election count marathons. Even if the outcome is predictable, as was the case with the UK General Election overnight, there are still the stories within the overall story to observe.
The ‘big names’ that fall; the shock results; the emergence of new personalities and, as sometimes happens, the ending – effectively in public view – of long political careers. For political/media ‘anoraks’, just watching (and comparing) the various channels’ coverage is a tradition to be enjoyed. (I thought Channel 4 won).
The main headline of course is that, after 14 years in power, the Tories were unceremoniously booted out. No surprises there. The public had had enough of the Conservatives: the Brexit saga, Partygate and associated disregard for Covid regulations, a scent of corruption, the Liz Truss fiasco, internal, damaging divisions over immigration – and so on.
It’s been billed as a Labour landslide, which it was in terms of seats gained in the House of Commons, but the fact that the party’s vote share was only marginally up on 2019 confirms that voters were motivated at least as much by turfing the Conservatives out as they were in elevating Keir Starmer to Number 10. When the Nigel Farage-led Reform Party won over 14% of the vote, it was the deathknell for the Tories’ slim chances of denying Labour power.
As to the stories within the overall story… former Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn denied his old party a seat by successfully running as an Independent, recent Prime Minister Liz Truss lost her seat, and 12 sitting Cabinet ministers were shown the exit. Banished from the Labour dugout, Corbyn is ready to be a constructive nuisance on the sideline!
Finally, only in the UK can you see ‘serious’ politicians soberly standing beside eccentric ‘oddballs’ as the results are read out by Returning Officers.
In the great tradition of the Monster Raving Loony Party, candidates this year included a man dressed as ‘Elmo’ from the Muppet Show, Count Binface (formerly Lord Buckethead, now an ‘intergalatic space warrior’), and a person holding a ventriloquist’s dummy. Meanwhile, as Jacob Rees-Mogg’s defeat was confirmed, the colourful MP received commiserations from a candidate wearing a balaclava of baked beans.
After the chaos of the Johnson/Truss era, and with Rishi Sunak having faced a virtually impossible salvage mission, Labour will aim to replace controversy and chaos with calmness and common sense, Starmer cast as the voice of reason*.
*Unlike the ventriloquist’s dummy.
SATURDAY/SUNDAY
Wilde about Gene
Having enjoyed the hurling thrillers (see page 38), I was delighted to come across a documentary on one of my favourite actors of all time, Gene Wilder (on Netflix). Remembering Gene Wilder was made in 2023. While the actor died in 2016, this affectionate, touching tribute is narrated by Wilder himself (from the autobiography audio-book for Kiss Me Like a Stranger: My Search for Love and Art).
There are contributions from various stars, most notably the great Mel Brooks (who celebrated his 98th birthday last month). Wilder’s widow, Karen Boyer, speaks movingly of her husband’s dementia diagnosis.
Wilder’s films with Richard Pryor were great fun, but the classics he will be most remembered for include Young Frankenstein, The Producers, Blazing Saddles, and Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory. In the latter, his performance bordered on genius. This tribute is recommended viewing for fans.
MONDAY
Summer daze
A meeting of the recently launched Solar (Summers of Long Ago Remembered) Society was held at a secret location in Roscommon last week. (A wag who works in the establishment hastily erected a ‘Four Seasons’ banner).
The starting time was postponed after the secretary, who had set off for the meeting on foot due to the beautiful sunny evening, phoned in and said he was trapped under a tree because of torrential rainfall.
When the meeting began, the chairperson explained to new members that the society had been formed by local residents who are nostalgic for summers of long ago, amid dismay over the erratic weather of recent months.
A man in his mid-50s said when he was a kid you could fry an egg on the stones outside his house. This comment attracted a quizzical look from a young boy who had been cajoled into attending by his parents. Why bring the eggs outside in the first place, he whispered to his mother.
A slightly older man said never mind frying eggs on the stones. His recollection of summers in Ireland was of endless long warm evenings saving the hay.
“Saving it from what?” the young boy – who was a townie – asked his mother.
The tar would be lifting off the road when we were walking to school, lamented a lady from a neighbouring village.
“God be with the hot days on the bog” said an old-timer.
“What’s a bo..” began the young boy, but his mother threw him a look.
A man who was well into his 80s took the roving mic. “We used to walk our cattle 15 miles to the feckin’ fair in May, and the day of the fair could be a scorcher!”
“It’s all to do with climate change” said a man who is thinking of running for the Council in 2029. But the chairperson was adamant about sticking to the agenda. “This society” he said, “is non-political. It was set up so that we can be nostalgic for those wonderful summers of the past. To lift our spirits, I propose to hold our next meeting in the open, on the green area up from this venue… in fact we’ll have a family day. Er… weather dependent of course”.
It was agreed that the chairperson would organise an outdoor barbeque, while the treasurer would arrange to borrow waterproof waders from the local angling club.
At the end of the meeting, the secretary asked a neighbour for a lift home, but he bashfully responded: “Actually, I came here on the ride-on lawnmower, I just had to give it a bit of a run”.
On the way out, the young boy looked at his mother and (not unreasonably) asked…
“Mum, what’s a feckin’ fair?”
