Tell me how you get on when you hit town with Donald Trump!
I kinda still like him…
Trump? Are you serious?
Well, he was FUN!
He wasn’t fun…well, he might have been fun, but he was dangerous too…
I dunno, I thought his presidency was low-key enough…
LOW-KEY? LOW-KEY? Are you trying to wind me up?
Eh…yeah. But really, it was some ride…and IT WAS fun. Great entertainment.
He mocked people…
Well, yeah…
He sent bizarre and provocative tweets.
So do Jedward…
He threatened to obliterate North Korea and called its leader Litte Rocket Man.
Wasn’t that a hit for Elton John?
What? North Korea?
No, Rocket Man…
He buddied up to Putin…
At the end of the day what you get out is linked to what you eh…put in…
He promised to build a wall! Okay, he made a start, but he never finished the job!
That proves nothing, there’s a builder up the road from me, very same thing, promised to build us a wall and it’s only half finished…
He ripped up international accords. He drove the UN mad. He turned on the FBI and the CIA…
He’s not a great man with letters, I’ll grant you that.
He was incredibly divisive…
You could say the same about Joe Brolly.
In the face of science and legal considerations and sheer logic he set himself up as an ultimate authority…
You could say the same about Joe Brolly. Anyways, I’d like to go for a pint with him…
Joe Brolly?
No, Trump! He’d be great craic.
It’s not possible, can’t happen.
I know, the pubs are closed, but…
No! Trump doesn’t drink. And he’d have no time for you!
On the contrary, I believe he’s very sociable. I know someone who met him in Doonbeg.
Okay, tell me how you get on when you go on the town with Donald Trump!
(They pause in honour of a momentous week in Washington DC, as Joe Biden succeeds Donald Trump)
You have to admit, he’s a gas man…
No, I don’t! He’s a narcissist, a would-be dictator, a man of thin skin!
Nobody’s perfect!
He was rude on TV!
You could say the same about Joe Brolly…
Stop talking about Joe! He’s a national treasure! Anyways, it’s over to the other Joe, the world’s most famous Joe…let’s move the conversation on!
I’m not ringing Liveline…haven’t a notion…
Not Joe Duffy! Joe Biden!
Oh, the Mayo man?
YES, the Mayo man. I give you the 46th President of the United States!
Ah fair play to him, but what will happen to Donald?
I don’t care…as far as I’m concerned, the American people gave him their verdict, which was: YOU’RE FIRED!
You’ll miss him…
I won’t!
(They pause to recall Trump catchphrases…‘Fake news’ ‘Make America Great Again’ ‘It’s gonna be great’ and ‘You’re a terrible reporter’…)
So, a Mayo man in the White House…
Yep! A bit of normality. I mean, Trump is so petty, he couldn’t even mention Joe Biden by name yesterday…
Maybe he’s not that keen on Mayo.
Huh?
Trump…
Yeah, maybe that’s it, he won’t say a fair word about the Mayos…
You could say the same about Joe Br…
