So, Ireland beat Scotland easily… that’s good!
Well, it’s kind of bad actually…
How so?
‘Cos now we’ll be explosively hot favourites against Wales, and there’s a danger of complacency!
Well, Donald Trump’s still signing executive orders… he’s a politician who is actually delivering on campaign commitments! Now THAT’S good!
Nah, that’s bad…
Why so?
Because if you ask me, most of what Donald Trump promised is not good!
Well, I didn’t ask you!
(They pause to hum along to Ireland’s Eurovision entry on hearing it on the radio)
Ireland has selected its Eurovision entry, a most original ditty it is too! Now THAT’S good!
No, that’s bad!
WHY?
‘Cos it reminds us all that the silly circus is coming up!
But the Eurovision is a gathering of eccentrics who dance around the studio grinning at the camera while pleading for votes… it’s fun, that’s good!
No, that’s bad! We already have a gathering of eccentrics who dance around the studio grinning at the camera and pleading for votes every weekend… it’s called Dancing with the Stars!
(They pause to see if Samantha Mumba has posted any more unmissable barbs against the Late Late Eurosong judges)
Well, there’s a new series of The Apprentice on TV, now that’s good…
No, that’s BAD! Because most of the contestants are vain and boring… plus, it reminds me of Donald Trump! After all, he used to star in the US version!
Well, the Super Bowl was on the other night, it’s sheer theatre, one of sport’s great annual events, now that’s good…
No, that’s bad, because I backed the Kansas City Chiefs, and they lost!
Well, there’s a new Bridget Jones movie out today… now that’s good!
No, that’s bad! Too many sequels is always bad!
(They pause to watch Real Madrid add to Manchester City’s woes with a late, late win in the Champions League)
Well, it’s Valentine’s Day tomorrow! LOVE-ly! Now that’s good!
Oh dear, that’s bad, for now at least! I forgot all about it! I’m gonna have to rush now and get organised!
Hold on! Before you go… St Patrick’s Day is just around the corner! Now THAT’S good!
I dunno! There are concerns that Mr Trump might not invite Mr Martin to the White House! Now that’s bad!
Well, speaking of Mr Martin, the Dáil’s sitting again! Now come on, my old friend, you have to admit… THAT’S GOOD!
What? Another gathering of eccentrics grinning at the camera and pleading for votes every week … nah, that’s bad… for my patience!
