It’s been a tense week for the boyos. Even the greatest partnerships can wilt under pressure… think Clough & Taylor, Roy Keane & Mick McCarthy, Haughey & Lenihan, Blair & Brown… and (most importantly of all) Louis Walsh & Jedward. Life can be unpredictable when you’re careering down the path of stardom. It all began when Boyo 1 confidently confirmed he does indeed intend to contest the General Election in Roscommon-Galway. He expected a slap on the back from Boyo 2. Instead, he received a bombshell…
Forget it, buddy! I’m actually running!
(Both in some shock, they agreed to meet at a secret location on Monday night, on condition that it was close to a pub. There was just one rule: their clear-the-air meeting was to be polite and mature)
You can’t run, you fe*ker, I’m running!
Oh no you’re not! I am!
Oh yes I am! I said it first!
Tuesday, they met again. The atmosphere was tense…
Seriously! I’ve let it be known for yonks that I have political ambitions. You can be my Director of Elections!
No! YOU can be MY Director of Elections!
But I really feel the time is right for me!
Well I’ve been approached by a lot of people – and community groups – asking me to run.
Oh PLEASE! Don’t start with those clichés!
To be honest, I’ve been humbled by the show of support out there for me!
Give me a break!
Wednesday, they exchanged tense phone calls. Again, they had agreed at the outset to remain mature…
My wife says you’re an egomaniac!
Huh! Look, I just feel the time is right for me to run. You are a dear friend, and I really want you to head up my campaign… I love how independent-minded you are…
Well my wife wants me to oppose you, and run myself!
But I’ve already been in Eddie Donnellan’s and John Corcoran’s enquiring about suits!
Huh! Did you get any political advice from Cllr Marty when you were in John Corcoran’s?
A little… and lots from John Corcoran too!
WEDNESDAY NIGHT
The boyos agreed to meet for a pint, in a bid to ease the tension. Early leaks of their meeting emerged as we went to press…
How about both of us running… with a voting pact?
Interesting idea!
Vote 1 for the boyo of your choice, and give your number 2 to the other boyo?
Brilliant! You canvass the north, and I’ll canvass the south…
And we’ll work something out in the middle?
Exactly!
One question: How important is it who the Pub Bore declares for?
Very important!
Both: As long as he doesn’t declare for ME!
