So, how exactly did you get into the Hyde last weekend?
Oh it was never in doubt!
Huh!
I am very emotionally attached to the Hyde… when I need to be there, I get there!
Mmnn…
Remember during Covid, that ladder I…
Yes, yes! We said we wouldn’t mention that ‘ladder in the cemetery’ episode!
(Editor: Oh dear! I asked these bozos, I mean boyos, to write an informed review of the local elections in Roscommon!)
So, did you have a media pass? Don’t tell me you went to the Editor behind my back…
I wouldn’t do that! I’m barely talking to the Editor these days, except to discuss that renewal of our contract… and I must say he’s being quite slow about responding!
Eh… three years out of contract, and counting, I’d say! Anyways, how did you get into the count centre?
Oh there was no drama! A friend kindly gave me their pass. I’m surprised I didn’t see you there!
So, any craic at the count?
It was a wonderful demonstration of democracy in action! And I got a great opportunity to network, which, as you can imagine, will greatly boost my campaign…
Boost YOUR campaign?
Look, you know we’re going to start our own political party! But let’s keep it hush hush for now! I got several good ideas last weekend!
Okay! Is it true the count went on until almost 4 am on Sunday morning?
Yes! It was a long weekend!
I heard a few people down the back fell asleep at one point…
Well yes, but that was because the pub bore came in… and started – uninvited – to explain the intricacies of proportional representation!
(They pause to savour online footage of the remarkable performances by Irish athletes at the European Athletics Championships)
You know, my friend, those Irish athletes are incredible!
Brilliant!
Let’s also give credit this week to ALL who put their name forward for election! Well done to all the winners, and well done also to those who didn’t get over the line this time!
Speaking of getting over the line, I say our athletes were the heroes of the week!
Indeed!
And to use athletics’ parlance, we need to be under starter’s orders if we’re going to launch a political party.
Okay! I guess we need to be limbering up for a race to the finish… will we launch the party in the Roscommon People next week?
No! Let’s keep it a secret for the moment. Timing will be key. I’ve been studying Michael Fitz’s model. After all, the General Election is a marathon, not a sprint!
